It has been nearly two years since I last posted. A lot has happened. But as "they" say, Life is a Journey. And as "I" say, no shit, Sherlock.
Where to begin?
I believe at the end. Now. I will start from now. My point of perception. Which has changed indelibly and to try and start from where I left off would just be impossible.
Since life is a circle, I am certain it all will come around no matter where I start.
To Begin, again:
I awoke in my bed this morning or um, afternoon, already in process. Which means for me, is being conscious or aware of something more going on than what it looks like. I was not "just lying in my bed" but had awareness of something trying to bubble to the surface.
I checked my phone and scanned some posts on Facebook. Not really looking for anything and I admit, I did get side tracked a little by the Friday Fluevogers posts of their recent additions to their shoe collections. So yummy.
After my shoe addiction was fed, (a girl's gotta eat), I spotted a post from Sondra Ray referencing the unconscious death urge and she was linking it to chronic fatigue syndrome. This made me think of Anthony Williams, the Medical Medium's belief that almost all or all autoimmune diseases are tied to the Ebstein Barr Virus. And, a commenter had made the same link.
The circle began to connect.
I have been dealing with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and hypothyroidism for, let's just call it an even ten years. It could be more, but definitely not less time.
It goes like this (this is fresh and raw and may add/delete/change my perspective):
Anthony Williams believes that the Epstein Barr Virus is also responsible for the millions of thyroid disease sufferers. I read an estimated 27 million Americans have some form of thyroid disease with a total of 13 million undiagnosed. Why is thyroid disease so common?. If Anthony is correct about EBV causing thyroid disease, the Epstein Barr Virus could be the physical representation of the unconscious death urge physicalized.
Autoimmune diseases attack the body. It is like a war within the body where it appears the body is killing itself. The unconscious death urge is part of the human blueprint. I think it is safe to say that humans come in with the fear of death. Most, if not all humans come in pre-loaded with the fear of death. It can be enforced and reenforced once we get to earth by what we experience. Also installed is an unconscious death urge. This sets up a dynamic of being afraid to die but at the same time, wanting to die.
This unconscious death urge is dormant until activated. What would activate an unconscious death urge or an unconscious wish to die? Events which create fear, unhappiness, loss, dis-ease...aka, a shitty life. Perhaps some are more impervious to events than others to having their unconscious death urge triggered. Enter a chronic state of fear, unhappiness, loss, dis-ease...aka, awakening.
When light workers or humans start to awaken, that triggers loss. The saying goes "on my way to awakening, I lost everything". The amount of stress placed on the human to change in order to awaken can be excruciating. You will engage all of your cycles. Life will no longer be just about survival. When you strip it all back, we get to death. Do you want to live? One can come to terms with the fear of death but still have an old program of the unconscious death urge running in the background. We can have a belief in death because that is what we see. The death urge preinstalled gives us a way out if we have had too much life and want an escape route. It also is part of the human condition to die. However, if we release the unconscious death urge, by making it conscious, we can embrace that death is a choice to die. It is not something which happens to us (unless it is unconscious). We can choose death, consciously. Which is mind blowing to some because some are so afraid to die that they want to live forever in the same old body with the self that inhabits that body.
And so, my friends, make the unconscious death urge, conscious. Stop the war within yourself. Afraid to live and afraid to die. End it. Choose life. Choose to live and choose to die. Get out of the old human programming. Don't be a "victim" of not choosing.
I just don't think one can eat enough fruits and vegetables to shut down an unconscious war against yourself. That is what an autoimmune disease is- and all the fruits, vegetables, supplements, acupuncture, deep tissues massages, yoga, crystals, channeling, etc is not going to be a force against the unconscious death urge. I know, because this is where I have been. These tools only helped me stay alive so that I could finally bring this unconscious death urge to light and choose life.
And as with all circles, when you choose life you choose death. Isn't that the dickens? No more fear. Choose love. All is love. Your life has been chosen with love. Walk in the shoes of love which are even more satisfying than all the John Fluevog shoes you can find on sale.
